Wednesday, December 29, 2010

"These are a few of my fav-o-rite things..."

"Ice cream with friends when I had ringworm on my cheek from a child, Maddy spending time with her cousins, Anabelle enjoying some heat in front of the space heater, Frank loving the drive to Arkansas in 'daddys truck', Maddy super excited about finally getting a DSi, Jeremy caught offguard by Batman 'draws', Getting the 'eww' face from Maddy when kissing her cheek, standing in the freezing cold with friends after serving, Jeremy and Maddy making cookies for the gate guards for Christmas, Pictures aren't the same if Maddy isn't making some silly face, Taking 'creeper' pics during trainings at work, Jeremy humbling himself and dressing up for a couples Halloween party (he's done this for me for 3 years now), Morrison snoozing on the radest chair I got from Goodwill, Newlyweds Brett and Nicole help me paint my hallway 'Eggplant', I say 'cheese' and Brynleigh says 'spit up', 'It's the Great Pumpkin Maddy Grist', Being with my little brother and sister for Christmas after 3 years, Anabelle giving me attitude because I put the Christmas shirt on her, and going for a walk with Frankie...and being 'that person' when he pooped on the grass and using a baggy to pick it up!"
"These are a few of my fav-o-rite things..."

Monday, December 20, 2010

"Do You Hear What I Hear?"

"Said the little lamb to the shephard boy, Do you hear what I hear..."

We have experienced quite a bit this year. Dealing with panic/anxiety due to a breakdown, saying good-bye to friends, my mom getting diagnosed with breast cancer, meeting new and wonderful friends, the birth of my neice, completing my 4th marathon, getting Frank, the death of a friend, and preparing for my husband to leave again.

A lot of things have changed this year but through it all, one thing remained...the voice of the Lord.

During the times of anxiety, I heard "Do not be anxious about anything..."

When saying good-bye to a really good friend, I heard the voice of the Lord say, "For the I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord..."

When my mom got diagnosed with breast cancer and struggled emotionally, I shut down. I wasn't listening to the voice of the Lord. It was when I decided to lay it down and allow God to show me how to love is when I heard the change HE was doing in her. It is a real and authentic change. That alone inspired me.

Meeting Sarah has been a great journey of faith. We talk about everything and our main passion is the Lord. She inspires me to be graceful, motivates me to go for my goals, and encourages me in my "weakness." The voice of the Lord speaks loud through our conversations.

My baby sister had a baby girl. I got to witness this amazing experience and I felt complete joy in the form of laughing, crying, and hope. The voice of the Lord was rejoicing just as much as we were!

Completing my 4th marathon? Well, lets just say I was the voice during that whole run. I pouted at the end and wondered why I felt the way I had...and then I heard the voice say, "you have your own purpose, there are too many states to be completed for you to cry over one." I was done pouting.

Getting Frank has been JOY! I mean that from everything I have. He has helped me with my "mothering" desires. You always hear about a woman's biological clock ticking...well, I don't think mine has ever stopped. I have always wanted more children. Frank is the baby of the family now and he has an amazing personality. I love him!

The death of a co-worker came as a surprise. Along with everyone else, my thought process was blank. I heard the voice of the Lord say, "it could happen just like that" and "only I am the judge."

With Jeremy leaving soon, I haven't really thought about what it's going to be like in the upcoming months. I don't have to think about them because the voice of the Lord has been using the Brandon Heath song, "Your Love" to show me He will be there.

I am learning to end this year with a new beginning. I want to hear HIM through everything!

"With a voice as big as the sea, with a voice as big as the sea"

Sunday, December 5, 2010


Man, has God been showing me in small (to others) ways the freedom He can give if we would just take it.

Can you imagine someone trying to give you a gift they made, bought, or handed down to you and you continue to refuse it? Well, it seems that is what I have been doing, closed off as I have been, with an area in my life.

Here is God giving me, with all his heart, a gift but I have continued to turn my head and say it's okay, I can do it on my own. This is the struggle that doesn't have to be, yet I have continued to feed it and allowing it grow.

This month we are learning how to have complete Joy without all the hype and "extras"of Christmas. You know what I mean when I, decorating the house to perfection, talking to others about grace, love, and peace, yet refusing it to your own loved ones. Gee wiz, how selfish I have been.

After reading the things we can do to end this year with a new beginning, one goal caught my eye. "Reconnect with a family member, friend, or someone you have been estranged from and make peace with them."

I know God did that on purpose. He knows my struggle with this person and He doesn't want us to live like this anymore. I am the one who has to make this step, I know. This blog is just my accountability and I want to do this, as nervous as I am.

I once heard a pastor say that the true meaning of "JOY" is found in that 3 letter word. Jesus Others You. Sad to say, with this person I have not lived it in that exact order. I lived it in my order, You (me) Others Jesus. And on a good day, You (me) Jesus Others.

God is so patient with me, as with you. I am so thankful He deals a little at a time with us. I don't know what it would be like if He threw everything (sin) from our hearts at us and gave us a deadline to resolve it all by. What a merciful, loving, saving God we have.

What does JOY look like to you?